Yesterday I had the opportunity to teach at homegroup.  We were going through the Village church’s character traits (truth, Christian spirituality, foot washing, missional living, and community) and this week was on community.  Can I just say how monumentally convicting that was?  To lead the group on what our church and what scripture says about living in community when I have been the poster boy for the exact opposite for the past few months.  God is not afraid to cut us deep, because in doing so He is saving us from death.

I tell people that I’m an introvert, mostly because I am but also because I don’t want to be vulnerable; I don’t want people to have access to my weaknesses and faults.  I want to be in control of the image that others see.  It is one of the loneliest feelings, being surrounded by fellow believers who I won’t let close enough to see the whole me.  I fear rejection and judgement but have never received either from this group of guys.  It has been the opposite; acceptance, grace and mercy.

Tonight I decided that I don’t want live like that anymore.  I want to strive for community.  I want to put forth the effort because I realize how much I need it.  I realize that it’s not easy and that it takes effort — every day.  Everyday I’ve got to choose community; choose to pick up the phone and call my guys, even if it’s just to say hi.  That’s my new goal for April — to be in community with my home group.  Prayers and words of encouragement are welcome