I will spend extra money for name brand foods like bread and pasta, but for some reason I’m unwilling to buy name brand meds… they’re all the same right?

Anyway, it’s now May which for me means that I’m nearly finished with the step study class at Celebrate Recovery. It’s been a LONG 5 months, but I am forever thankful for the life change God has brought about during such a short period of time. Here’s the thing that still worries me; I am so thankful to be free from some of the “name brand” sins in my life but sometimes I wonder if I’m becoming complacent. If I spent more time battling sin and not enough time seeking God. I wonder if my focus has been more on recovery than it has been on knowing the God who set me free.

I know what I MUST do, but it’s DOING it that has been the struggle. Ben Stuart said something that stuck with me this weekend (well he said a LOT of things that stuck with me this weekend). He said “I’ve never met a mature Christian who didn’t spend time in the Word daily. I’ve never met an immature Christian who did.” That has been a struggle of mine for years and it seems to have been the theme God has in my life currently. I’ve experienced great joy from walking in obedience over the past few months but now my spiritual life has kind of plateaued. I reluctantly ask Him “what now?” afraid He’s going to again tell me to do something that I don’t exactly want to do. The funny thing is, I’m not really getting that this time. That voice that I used to hear so clearly is growing faint but everyone around me is telling me the same thing. Read the Bible.

Not just read the Bible. Study the Bible. Wrap myself in the Word of God, wrestle with it, mediate on it, drink it in. Devour it. Renew my mind with it.

“for everyone who lives on milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, since he is a child. But solid food is for the mature, for those who have their powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil.

Therefore let us leave the elementary doctrine of Christ and go on to maturity, not laying again a foundation of repentance from dead works and of faith toward God, and of instruction about washings, the laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment. And this we will do if God permits.” – Hebrews 5:13-6:3

I guess it’s time to grow up.